Thanks for the support everyone! (and for the record, I don't think I would ever QUIT blogging altogether) I guess I am just tired of trying to make everyone feel comfortable, but you're right, it's MY blog, so today I'm going post something that I feel pretty strongly about.
Since before I decided to try to conceive, I started researching my options for childbirth and all that accompanies. There ARE options out there. I read Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, Spiritual Midwifery, a bunch of Dr. Sears, and many other more mainstream childbirth/pregnancy books. I read I think I was too young/frightened of approval/unsure of myself to decide to do what I wanted to do, and as a result I had a pretty traumatic (to me) first birth.
Mistakenly, I believe, many people think that the only thing that matters when a child is born is their health/lack of "problems". While I am TRULY grateful for the birth of two very healthy boys, that is not all that matters. To say this is selfish is to really discount the consequences of a major life experience. Having a child is a life changing experience. It changes you no matter how it is done. It can be frightening/scarring/traumatic or it can be empowering/beautiful/peaceful. Of course there are in-betweens on that spectrum as well, which is what I consider the birth of E to be. The point is, a woman will always remember (even if the memories are perceived) the way she was treated when birthing. This is a memory/feeling/mood that relationships and future experiences with birth, with the child, with many things will cast in. I feared birth the second time around, and the book Birthing from Within and Ina Mae's Guide to Childbirth helped heal some of those scars and so I could move on to have a better experience the second time around.
I don't know when I will choose to have another children/child at this point, but I do know that I have made the choice to have a normal, peaceful birth at home. (I am not saying OB's are bad/stupid, but they are the product of many years of conditioning by a country hell-bent on making money above all else) I just want people to at the very least look into their options and decide for themselves what they want to be their life-altering experience. I would HIGHLY recommend seeing the documentary "The Business of Being Born" (directed by Abby Epstein) which delves into these very issues and uncovers some pretty crazy statistics about the poor death rates/health of our country's birthing situation. Since I had read a lot on the subject, not much of it was a surprise to me, but I think it would be to some.
It is not scary to give birth without drugs, and it is not unsafe to give birth at home. What is scary is the unnecessary interventions (and accompanying "complications") you will have at the hospital if you don't educate yourself and have the confidence/support to act in your own best interest. Do it.
That's all. (I was really just trying to see how many times I could type / )
7 comments:
All I can say is "Amen", but I'm sure you knew that already.
I'm off to look for that film. Is it rentable?
I watched it on Netflix, but I'm pretty sure you can rent it. It has Riki Lake on it I think. She's the one who made it with Abby.
Thank you for your "soapbox" I really do appreciate it! Way to speak up for what you believe!
You know me, and I do like the hospital, But... I had K naturally and will definitely do it again.
The other day I was talking to a brand new mother about the birth of her baby. She said she wouldn't even dream of having a baby without an epidural. I just thought, how would you even know.
We are just brought up thinking child birth is the worst, most painful, hideous thing ever. I'm going on the record to say, it's not a walk in the park, but its not as horrible as everyone seems to think. (and the recovery for a natural birth is WAY WAY faster.)
I had all my children C-section so I didn't have an option but I don't think I would be brave enough to choose a natural childbirth. I think everyone needs to do what feels right to them. I definitely doesn't hurt to educate yourself. However, I have to say that I would not be alive today without modern medicine, so there are good things about the system too.
thanks for the soapbox kins. and from one who knows, my bathtub at home birth was way better than my hospital one (even though there were paramedics and the like involved in the former) Next time we'll just plan it with a midwife and not have to worry about all that junk!
I have to say that I would rather go through childbirth than a lot of the other crap people go through. Luckily I have had amazing Dr.'s who have made the experience a positive one for me. I wish I could try naturally, and did try with Connor. However, due to my backwards tailbone, my children wouldn't be able to come out. I think it's awesome that you are doing what's best for you! I say yay for you getting educated and making a decision on what you feel and know, rather than what someone tells you to feel and do.
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