I'm glad I had the presence of mind to ask the nurse if I could do it when she said he needed his diaper changed. It is something so familiar that a mom does for her baby so often.
He never really got a bath, but I did get to wash his hair after they took off the stickers on his head.
Sorry if this bums people out, that's not my intention. I just think a lot about what kinds of things I'd be doing for him if he were still here with me. Yesterday I received the copy of his medical records from Primary Children's that I had requested, and it's gotten me really down.
11 comments:
Sorry about this sad, sad thing! I like hearing about little Nolan, I'm sad that I never met him and it is fun to get to know him as much as possible. I love you and am praying for you!
Don't apologize at all! You are allowed to feel how you need and want to feel. I personally think it's good for you to post things and talk about it. It helps me too and I hope you know that we love you. I'm sorry that you are going through something so hard and sad. Take your time and keep posting.
I love the pictures of you bathing and changing Nolan, you look so happy doing those "mommy" things, and I am so glad you had the opportunity to do those things. It also helps remind all of us that he was a real baby, not just a sad event.
Love all of you so much,
I like reading your posts about Nolan as well. It is insightful for those of us that care about you and helps us understand a little more of what you must be feeling. Thanks for sharing.
I would have to agree with all the comments. I think it is great to hear about the things that you were able to do for him while he was here. I am truly sorry for your loss, just know that you are loved. Thank you for sharing with us something that is so near and dear to your heart. Thank you for sharing him with us!
Those are sweet pictures! Like Allie said it is nice to kind of "understand" what you feel and think about. If you want to get out you can come and have Star Trek movie night at our house. If you are into that kind of thing. I am not too sure I am :) but that is movie of the night at our house.
Wow 6 weeks already? Its ok to feel down. You have to grieve in your own time and in your own way. K you are amazing. (((((HUG)))))
Chris and I got a bit sad again missing him yesterday. We were talking about all the family visiting next week... and we got to thinking that we'd kind of been planning on holding your little boy. We still think of Nolan and you often.
I am so proud of you! YOu are such an inspiration. I am sorry you have to go though this.
I've been thinking about you a lot this week. That six week marks I think was when things kind of came to a head for me.
I'm so glad you were able to have those moments with him. It really changes the perspective of the "Aw, man, gotta change another diaper." mentally. Every little moment should be treasured.
I wish there was more I could say, but know that we're still thinking of all of you and sending our love.
every friday, I think about you. And every time we hang out I feel like there's someone missing. can't wait til we can all hang out in heaven :)
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